Fathers: Information You Need to Know
The average age of onset for an eating disorder is 14, although some girls can develop the disorder even earlier. This is a time of tremendous change in a girl’s life, due to the advent of puberty. An eating disorder can start innocently enough; an adolescent, like many of her friends, may decide to try the latest fad diet talked about at school, or touted online. Although others briefly flirt with the diet, this adolescent starts down the path to an eating disorder.
If an eating disorder has become part of your daughter’s life, it is important to understand its impact on her.
Medical/physical
Every stage of a child’s growth is important, especially the teenage years. An eating disorder, whether anorexia or bulimia, can take an extreme toll on key organs such as the heart and the brain. They must have food to function and grow. While many of the medical consequences of an eating disorder can be rectified in time, some can’t. An example of potentially irreversible damage is seen in the skeletal system. A significant amount of protein and calcium is required for bones to develop correctly. If deprived during formative years, the bones will not mature and a girl’s growth can be irreversibly stunted. Another highly vulnerable area is the endocrine system. If extreme hormonal disruption occurs during puberty, it can affect her future fertility.
Behavioral/psychological
Eating disorders are extremely difficult for most people to understand. Many believe anorexia and bulimia are caused by the individual’s desire to be beautiful and even glamorous. This is rarely the case. Recent research has identified genetic and neurological problems that predispose individuals, especially females, to develop eating disorders. An example of this type of inherited personality trait is extreme perfectionism. In our society, where appearance is highly valued, a perfectionistic young person may pursue thinness as an achievement. However, when perfection is the goal, it is difficult to determine just how thin is “thin enough.”
At the heart of nearly every eating disorder lie core emotional issues. These issues can include anything from the desire to be accepted and loved, to the need to cope with anger or shame. There is nothing wrong with wanting these things. The problem is how she is going about achieving these goals. What’s more, it may not stop with an eating disorder. Over time, the influence of the eating disorder may decrease and the girl may turn to substance abuse, sexual promiscuity, self-harm, or other unhealthy coping mechanisms.
The longer any behavior is practiced, the more difficult it is to alter or extinguish that behavior. A person who smokes for 20 years will find quitting far more difficult than a person who smoked for two. The same holds true for an eating disorder; the longer a girl engages in unhealthy food-related behaviors, the harder it is to get her back on the right track. If adjunctive behaviors, such as drug or alcohol abuse are practiced, then the problems become much more difficult, the treatment process becomes more complex, and the possibility of relapse is heightened dramatically.
What can you do? The most important advice we can offer any father of a child with anorexia or bulimia is this: although it may seem uncomfortable, try to talk to your daughter; or better yet, try to listen to her. This may help you understand a little better and help her feel understood. Secondly, don’t wait to seek help. Early intervention can make a significant difference in the progress of the illness and her chance for a meaningful recovery. For additional information call 1-800-445-1900 today.
